Member-only story
Love Queer Youth; You’ll Save a Life
A Poem for Acceptance
I wrote a lot of poems about being LGBTQ+ and the LGBTQ+ people I love(d) in UNGODLY. I came out early and had many privileges in my journey. I realized I was LGBTQ+ when I was 15 after going to a writing camp and I came out within the year. While my dad and stepmom were accepting, along with my church family, I didn’t get the same reaction from my mom.
My mom asked me if I was still dating the same guy, and I was. I was attracted to women and men (and anyone else) in general, but that didn’t mean I was suddenly going to dump the man I was attracted to. Once she was satisfied that I would still have a boyfriend, she never wanted to speak of it again. She didn’t want to know and she definitely didn’t want her family to know. She passed away within a few months of my coming out; while I was lucky to stay housed once I came out, I was not truly accepted or loved by my mom.
There is a strange grief that comes with losing an abusive or non-accepting parent. While I suddenly felt safer in the world, there was this new ache. I lost any chance to ever reconcile with my mom, no way for her to change or grow or accept me wholly.
The loss of hope rocked my world in ways I did not understand. How could I miss someone who hurt and neglected me, physically and emotionally? But in…
